Are you really in love? Or do you think that you are in love?
There is a big difference between Love and infatuation. Some people can't tell the difference, thinking they are in love but really it is a deep infatuation. Infatuation is instant desire - one set of glands calling to another.
Love is friendship that has caught fire. It takes root and grows, one day at a time.
Infatuation is marked by a feeling of insecurity. You are excited and eager, but not genuinely happy.
There are nagging doubts, unanswered questions, little bits and pieces about your beloved that you would just as soon not examine too closely. It might spoil the dream.
Love is the quiet understanding and mature acceptance of imperfection. It is real. It gives you strength and grows beyond you - to bolster your beloved. You are warmed by their presence, even when they are away.
Miles do not separate you. You have so many wonderful little films in your head that you keep replaying.
But near or far, you know they are yours, and you can wait.
Infatuation says, "We must get married right away. I can't risk losing them."
Love says, "Be patient. Don't panic. Plan your future with confidence."
Infatuation has an element of sexual excitement. Whenever you are together, you hope it will end in intimacy.
Love is not based on sex. It is the maturation of friendship, which makes sex so much sweeter. You must be friends before you can be lovers.
Infatuation lacks confidence. When they're away, you wonder if they're cheating. Sometimes, you check.
Love means trust. You are calm, secure and unthreatened. They feel your trust, and it makes them even more trustworthy.
Infatuation might lead you to do things you will regret, but love never steers you in the wrong direction.
Love is an upper. It makes you feel whole. It completes the circle. It fills the empty space in your heart.
Love is elevating. It lifts you up. It makes you look up. It makes you think up.
It makes you a better person than you were before. If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things you don't have. If there is no love in your life, whatever else there is has a lot less meaning. The secret of our being is not only to live but to have something to live for.
INFATUATION
Infatuation is a feeling; real love involves a commitment also. Infatuation is just love of emotion. Real love, though, is love of devotion. Only the emotions are affected in infatuation, but in real love both the emotions and the will are involved. Next, a person "fall into" infatuation, but "grows into" real love.
Guys, have you ever seen a girl who was so beautiful that you thought you'd faint?
This is infatuation! It is based totally on physical attraction. often you don't know much in-depth about the person you so-called love. Thus, infatuation is mostly biological. Also remember, never tell a girl you love her, unless you are willing to marry her.
Then, infatuation is basically selfish where real love is basically selfless.Infatuation is more interested in satisfying yourself and the feeling than it is in the other person.
Real love is primarily interested in the other person. It seeks to give instead of get.. Love unselfishly seeks the highest good for the other person.
Lastly, infatuation is weakened by time and separation where real love is strengthened by time and separation.
This does not mean that there will be no pain in separation. On the contrary, there is great pain in separation if
you are truly in love.
LOVE
Now you know what is infatuation, we will go on to discuss about the details of a true love. Love is patient. The word translated "patient" means to wait patiently for the fulfilment of expectations.
When you have difficulty dating this girl and she does not want to come out, if you truly love her, you will not complain and blame her, you must look at the situation from her point of view - maybe she is having some problems which prevented her from coming out. You must react to it with patience and understanding.
Next, have you ever met someone you liked so much that you wanted to push the relationship and make it progress faster? Sure you have! Love, however, is willing to give a relationship time to grow at a natural pace.
It does not push but is willing to wait for the relationship to grow at a rate that is satisfactory to both parties.
Love is Kind Love seeks to encourage and build up others. It respects the feelings and emotions of others..
It finds its greatest satisfaction in making others happy.
You can do the following:
1. Give one another things such as gifts and encouragement cards.
2. Compliment one another. Magnify the other party's strength.
3. Listen to one another. Pay close attention to what each of you has to say and make each other feel that what each says is important.
4. Treat one another special in public. Compliment and encourage one another sincerely in the presence of others.
5. Love is Not Jealous. Jealousy usually indicates an insecure and immature heart. Love wants the best for others, but jealousy is possessive. Jealous is reflected in the childish statement, "If he is going to talk to her, then he can just forget
about me!" Often, one person wants to totally possess the other and to restrict her relationships with others.
6. Love is not about bragging. Love is not a windbag and is not anxious to impress. Often a guy will brag to a girl, trying to impress her so that she will like him. A truly great person, however, does not need to exalt himself! Others will exalt him.
7. Love is Not Arrogant. Love is not conceited, boastful,cocky, or stuck-up. Love, instead, is humble and has a servant attitude. Sometimes, a guy may come across to a girl with an "I can take you or leave you" attitude. His demeanour implies, "You ought to be thankful that somebody as neat as me is dating you." Of course, this is not love.
8. Love always covers. This word cover means to pass over in silence, to keep confidential.
9. Love is patient with the faults of others. It doesn't criticise and broadcast to the world the faults of others.
Love is there even when it knows the other is not perfect.
10. Love always Perseveres. Love always stands its ground and hold out. It will outlast anything. It will even love in the face of unrequited love. Real love will last though all sorts of trials, tribulations and stresses.
11. Love is Not Provoked. This means that love has a long fuse. It does not become irritated and angry. It is not easily offended.
12. Love does not seek its own. This is the heart of love. Love is other-centred rather than self- centred. Love says, "I love you, I want to give to you." Selfishness says, "I love you, I want you!"
13. Love does not act unbecomingly. This means that love does not behave disgracefully, dishonourably or indecently. It does not embarrass others by its action. It is characterised by tact and sensitivity. This also means that love should have good manner. Be sure to do little things like opening doors for your girl, or offering her your arm when you walk together.
The next day comes.....We were in the same cafe,We were on the same table...
Again she was with the same look...
Suddenly I asked the waiter, "Would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee." Everybody stared at me, so strange! my face turned red but still, I put the salt in my coffee and drank it. She asked me curiously, "Why you have this hobby?" I replied, "When I was a little boy, I lived near the sea, I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea, just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my hometown, I miss my hometown so much, I miss my parents who are still living there." While saying that tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched. That's his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart. A man who can tell out his homesickness, he must be a man who loves home, cares about home, has responsibility of home... Then she also started to speak, spoke about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her family.
That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful beginning of their story. We continued to date. She found that actually I was a man who meets all her demands; I had tolerance, was kind hearted, warm, careful. I was such a good person but she almost missed me! Thanks to my salty coffee! Then the story was just like every beautiful love story, the princess married to the prince, and then we were living the happy life... And, every time she made coffee for me, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knew that's the way I liked it.
After 40 years, before I passed away, left her a letter which said, "My dearest, please forgive me, forgive my whole life's lie. This was the only lie I said to you---the salty coffee. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time, actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt. It was hard for me to change so I just went ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our communication! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything... Now I'm dying, I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth, I don't like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste... But I have had the salty coffee for my whole life! Since I knew you, I never feel sorry for anything I do for you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can live for the second time, still want to know you and have you for my whole life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again."
Her tears made the letter totally wet. Someday, someone asked her, "What's the taste of salty coffee?" She replied, "It's sweet."
